Apology and Introduction
(note-starting today, 7th December 2009, I am posting the whole of my cookery book on line, essentially as it originally
appeared. I have corrected a few mistakes which crept though and added a few comments, italicised to distinguish them
from the original text. The illustrations will be added when I work out how to do it. The book was originally published at
my expense in a print run of 300, which almost sold out. All proceeds went to funding a church extension in Botley, which
due to much other fundraising and donation opened debt-free and now houses a local library. The book was priced £8.
Rather than charge for downloads, I am making this freely available for anyone to use for any honest, non for profit use. I
would like to ask anyone who uses and enjoys this book to make a suitable donation to any charity of your choice which
is relieving poverty.. but anyhow, I hope this is of some use, and I may add to it as I find time.
I assert my copy rights as author, you may use, download, copy or share this, but you may not sell it
without my permission. Stephen Hayes, 7th December 2009
A year ago, I read about a 'reality TV’ series 'The week the women left' about 12 family men left to
manage without women. It read 'none of the men can cook’. They ate expensive takeaways and
microwaved ready-meals.
When I was a boy, men went out to work and women mostly stayed at home, had babies, shopped,
washed, ironed and cooked. Times have changed, now women have to go out to work AND do all the
house work AS WELL! No wonder so many are ‘tired all the time’. (*)
I taught myself to cook with some help from my wife Julia, books, TV, and trial and error over the last 30
years or so. I have tried to pass on what I have learned in a style that appeals to men. I think men have
a different approach to learning and cooking than women and want a range of no nonsense recipes
they can learn quickly and then adapt.
Gender stereotyping doesn’t encourage boys or men to cook. I’m OK with traditional man/woman
divisions of labour when they make sense and are mutually agreed. However, there is absolutely no
reason for men not to cook. I enjoy cooking and Julia enjoys a break from it sometimes, as long as the
food’s OK. Some evenings after our very different working days I am mentally and emotionally tired after
a day in my clinic, she is physically tired after a day at the orchard or a farmers’ market. I can unwind by
cooking while she watches a Miss Marple DVD.
Talking about this male/female cooking conundrum with Peter Lowater, a friend who contributed a
couple of recipes, he said he’d only started cooking when his wife Jenny entered the Anglican ministry.
Since Jenny could hardly prepare and lead worship in church and do dinner as well, Sunday dinner was
under threat. Peter rightly refused to accept this, and acted like a real man by learning how to do
Sunday dinner!
Cooking involves a creative, physical satisfaction, and sharing. It isn't very difficult. You can start with
one easy dish, shin beef stew for example. Once you learn a few basics, you can add your own
touches. You will soon be ‘consciously competent’ with half a dozen dishes you can serve up without
anxiety or embarrassment. You will find this satisfying, and will gain complements. And if you are a
married man, your wife may be a little less tired.
So, I have written to address an unmet learning need for men, whether in families or living alone, and
their teenage sons and nephews as they go off to university or otherwise leave home and try to eat
decently on a budget, and perhaps even impress a young lady with their enlightened attitude in the
kitchen.
Introduction
I wrote this between spring 2005 and autumn 2006, and have addressed a range of cookable, tasty
food enjoyed in England today, with an international flavour. I divided the book into chapters based on
what I actually cook. It’s 200 pages long, not 2,000, please forgive me for what I have left out. I have
suggested resources if you want to go further.
I cooked and ate everything, except a few recipes by named friends. Most recipes are borrowed and
adapted; as Solomon wrote, ‘there is nothing new under the sun’.
‘Principles are all’ as one of my teachers used to say. If you understand the principles of cookery, you
can modify recipes by substituting ingredients. I have tried to offer a method rather than a list of
recipes. Each step of every recipe is not spelled out every time, in the interest of brevity. Every
significant technique is described in detail at least once, usually at the start of a chapter. To get the
best from this book, read it all before you start cooking
In each section, I have set out principles, key recipes, and variations. One stir fry, salad, casserole,
roast or curry is much like another, so when you have mastered the basics, you can ring the changes. I
have assumed some common sense, no half-raw potatoes, salt poisoning or chilli catastrophes,
please! Good timing comes with practice.
There are no difficult recipes here, although the beginner male cook may need to work on basic skills
as he ascends the learning curve towards conscious competence. It’s OK to make mistakes (within
reason!) if you learn from them.
I have used some black and white photos and drawings to illustrate points. Many cook books are full of
colour photos which treble the cost of production and add little for the learner, so I don’t apologise for
my black and white pictures and rough drawings. Clarissa Dickson-Wright (**) said on Radio 4 the other
day she talked to some male graduates and they 'didn’t know how to cut up an onion.' I hope you
don’t mind me using a rough sketch to show you how to cut up onions. Julia taught me this foundational
skill.
PS Most ingredient quantities are given in teaspoons (tsps) grams (gm) centimeters (cm) litres and
millilitres (mls), but non standard male measures e.g. dollops and dashes are also used. A dollop is
about 25 mls; a dash varies between 0.5mls (e.g. red Tabasco) to 10 mls if referring to sherry. A
generous dollop e.g. of oyster sauce is proportionately more. I was asked once how much a ‘knob’ of
butter was. I suggest it is about the size of the top joint of your thumb.
(*) as a GP, I know that 'tired all the time, or TATT as we call it for short, is one of the most common
things women go to a doctor complaining of. There is occasionally a physical cause like anaemia or
hormone problems (thyroid disease for example) so its worth having a blood test if its at all persistent or
severe, but generally no physical cause can be found. I'm sure some of it is due to the way we live
today.
(**) Clarissa Dickson-Wright bought a copy of my book when she visited our apple stall at Winchester
Farmers Market. We have also had the Hairy Bikers and Rick Stein visit. She has never got back to me
to say what she thought of the book, but it is written for inexperienced male cooks.
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